Self Doubt, Confidence and That Little Voice Inside Your Head

Cisco Rose shares 4 simple steps to love your mistakes and build confidence. 
When I was asked to join the team and write for My Counselling Service Australia , I was stoked. Writing has been something I had wanted to do for years, and even though I had been putting in the work and writing most days , I was yet to take my own advice to get off my ass and just do it , ‘Get Cisco and his ideas out there!’ (yep, I’m talking third person).

So when the opportunity came up I  jumped at it , but not before the little voice inside my head decided to test me a little.

The Voice that said: “Are you a writer?” ….“Can you really do this ?”…. “You don’t use big words” ….or ” Who wants to read anything from you, pal? “….”What are you going to write about? ” ….and a whole bunch of other “What if? “ questions that tried to derail me from something I really wanted to do.

It got me thinking. 

Why do we try to talk ourselves out of new challenges , experiences and learning curves ?

Fear , looking stupid , not knowing , making mistakes ?

icandoit….Now I will admit that this moment of self doubt was only fleeting , and the reason for this, was a combination of both confidence, and understanding the concept that trying something regardless of the outcome is an opportunity to learn and grow.

” I’m Not Doing it Wrong , I’m just Learning.” is one of my mantras. 

Ok, that’s easier said than done right?  Don’t worry it’s a concept that takes time to ingrain and somewhat master. So let’s break it down.
Here are few steps to love your mistakes and build confidence.

1) Ego Is Not A Dirty Word. But…..

We all have an Ego , we need it to achieve anything in life; but controlling it is the hard part.

Knowing when to swallow your pride and having a laugh at yourself is key.

Get comfortable in being wrong , not being perfect , looking silly and making mistakes.  This is how you learn !!! -Yeah it can be uncomfortable and difficult, but most things in life worth doing are… that’s why they are held in such high regard.

wherethemagichappens2) Stop Playing It Safe

If I don’t make mistakes in French, I am not pushing hard enough, I’m playing it safe, thus limiting my scope of learning.
Progression takes guts, balls and a healthy dose of humble pie.
Cuddle up with uncomfortable, give it a go and find out what works and what doesn’t.

3) Be Open and Ask for Help and feedback.

You are not the only one , someone before you has been there , done that and bought the T-shirt. Learn from their experiences and mistakes. and build from there. (It’s almost like getting a head start.)

I have many people that give me little “Brain Treats” to set me on my way. -Not everyone is a jerk; most people will take a second to lend a helping hand to a fella giving it a crack.

You don’t have to take everyone’s feedback on board. Some things will resonate with you, some will not, but for the most part, if it’s help and feedback you yourself have sought out, it’s something you need to hear regardless.

4) Make Your Bed.

What ??? Err….Righto, Cisco….

…..Confidence is built on doing the work and relying on yourself to do what you say you will. This builds an “I can”  attitude, because you have said you’re going to do something and you have done it.

Set small , basic goals to do throughout the day that you must do , NO MATTER WHAT.
Something as simple as making your bed like a proper responsible adult ( heard this somewhere a while ago and loved it ) is a good place to start because it’s easy , you can do it everyday and it’s an early morning task. Ticking off tasks & goals early morning sets you up for the rest day, so by the time you hit your 9-5 you have already achieved something.
As you progress, increase the amount of goals (but not too many), focus on the small steps towards your bigger goals and watch your ” Swag ” grow.
….We have been told for so long that we “can’t” , we “shouldn’t” , we “won’t” and to ” stay in your lane ” , that we actually believe this to be true;  but just look at you mentors and role models (whoever they may be), and I guarantee you that they too have fought off self doubt, pushed their boundaries , embraced their mistakes and learned from the best…..Shit they might even still make their bed.

Happy Mistake Hunting 🙂

Talk Soon ,

Cisco Rose

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 ciscoroseCisco Rose is a musician, artist, speaker, writer, French student and personal trainer with killer abs and an attitude to match. Cisco is passionate about ‘real talk’ and helping people to achieve their goals, and does not believe in excuses or self pity. Cisco has recently moved back to Australia after residing in Port Vila, Vanuatu, and is ready to take on the world, sharing his unrestrained and uncensored messages of courage and perseverance to whoever has the guts to listen and take it in. One of his signature sayings is: “Do you want to be bitter, or do you want to be better?” 

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